Thinking Systems Blog

Emotional Connection Theory

May 14, 2024emotional contact, fusion, togetherness

Emotinal connection starts with Mom and baby

Emotional Connection Theory - what is it? Emotional Connection theory is an attempt to explain the mother infant bonding process. The authors believe that the mother infant bonding is a learned or conditional response. This learning occurs during the

Change a preterm brain

April 24, 2024emotional contact, fusion

The Power of Emotional Connection (Please note: This post could create powerful feelings in some individuals. The research references are listed below and will provide a more complete description of the material. They are quite easy to read and under

What is good emotional contact

April 15, 2024Anxiety, differentiation, emotional system, togetherness

Dr. Bowen and Dr. Kerr have written about the value of having good emotional contact with family members. But what is "good emotional contact"? How is this different from an emotional connection? How does it relate to one's level of differentiation?

What’s missing in best relationship advice?

March 25, 2024Uncategorized

Relationship advice - Ideas from a systems viewpoint We are learning more about how good relationships are important to optimal functioning and health. The research on loneliness is making this clear, for example. A recent NY Times article offering t

Be a better observer

March 14, 2024Uncategorized

Observe, Evaluate, Interrupt: Being More Thoughtful in Real-Time Being a better observer is essential for becoming more differentiated, a fundamental concept of Bowen family systems theory. Differentiation of self has two parts. The first is distingu

Polyvagal Theory – An Introduction

February 23, 2024Uncategorized

When the Anxiety Increases: An Introduction to Polyvagal Theory Dodgeball I was never very athletic growing up. Often I came in last or second to last in school races. I was usually picked last for teams unless I made persuasive, pleading eyes at a

Stress and the Shower Curtain

February 8, 2024Uncategorized

A Story of Stress and a Shower Curtain A few years ago I got very sick after an incredibly stressful series of weeks in my life (a common response to stress for me). After being sick for an entire weekend, my teenage daughter commented to me, “I kn

Functioning UP in 2024

January 25, 2024Uncategorized

Get serious, sensible and self-ish You've had time to get going on your resolutions. Resolutions are about what I call "functioning up". For one to function up, you need to get serious, sensible, and self-ish. What do I mean by function up? Dr. Bowen

You say you want a resolution!

January 15, 2024Uncategorized

You say you want a resolution Forgive the takeoff on the Beatles song. You now have had a couple of weeks with your 2024 resolutions. How is it going? Are you changing your world? I'm going to suggest that a systems perspective could help with making

The Giving Tree Revisited

December 25, 2023Uncategorized

The Giving Tree revisited For those of us that celebrate Christmas, there is a tradition of giving gifts. A children's book about giving called The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein has been a popular gift over the years. But it has a mixed message abo